EDITOR'S NOTE: The weather this winter all over the nation has been awful. Even on the normally balmy U.S. Gulf Coast only extreme South East Louisiana has escaped a few snow flurries and at least two bouts of day time subfreezing temperatures. Even south of New Orleans there have been at least 5 nights at or below freezing. South East Louisiana meteorologists rate December -February (so far) 2013-14 the coldest winter in 20 years. Of course having experienced New England Winters and the far milder winters of Maryland and Northern Virginia I often feel that "winter" should always appear in quotes when discussing the cool season on the Gulf Coast. When I ran across this old post from the Great Catfish recently it hit me that what he described in his famous defense of former demigods is quite true, Back when we attributed unpleasant natural events to demigods we had an actual personality to blame for the unpleasantness. No wonder the Great catfish decided to just get a regular job.-Johnas Presbyter, editor
NAMAZU DEFENDS DEMIGODS AS WEATHER MAKERS
Hi, Namazu here reporting from the Sea of Japan. I'd like to thank everyone for the many complimentary E-mails, cards and letters I've received since the start of my recent career as an analyst. You are all just too kind! Out of respect for the few dissenting opinions, particularly those who objected to me as a former pagan figure, and felt that I should be consigned to the junk heap of history, I'd like to respond. First please note that I refer to myself as a "former Japanese religious icon". The Japanese do not now, nor did they ever "worship" me. I was always just a "demigod". That's "demi" as in small, minor, inferior grade, god with a small case "g". Perhaps an unfortunate description but not one that my cousins and I were overly proud to claim. If you've been reading along for some time you've seen the pictures of how our lives were at the height of our demigod days when we were under the strict control of the god (small case "g") Kashima. Remember the images of me with my head under the point of Kashima's sword, or with Kashima standing on my back with a stone pressed down on my head humiliating me in front of my smaller cousins? Now considering how helpless I looked and how clearly Kashima was struggling does anyone think we really represented any challenge to THE ALMIGHTY GOD? We acknowledge him and are quite comfortable with him, we refer to him by various names like "The Big G", and "Boss".
We former "demigods" are Forces of Nature, we manifest our particular intelligence in the operation of the earth's heat budget. We let out the occasional fissure to allow volcanic heat to escape and we keep the tropics from burning up and the polar regions from being frozen all year. We do these services for Mother Earth through seismic activity, weather fronts and storms. Today many of you believe that we are nothing more than the sum of our parts. Well, consider the coherent actions and useful results in terms of the Earth's habitability that come from the interaction of our parts? Do you not see a kind of coherent intelligence there? Lets take the recent Frankenstorm . We can explain it in terms of a hurricane formed in the Gulf taking a turn to the north east due to steering currents originating from an early and deep cold front coming off the Canadian shield and dipping deep into the Gulf Coast region due to a deep bend in the jet stream. Then as the storm traveled north away from the usual path it became enveloped in the upper part of the same frontal system and evolved into a storm within a storm, a virtual super storm.
OK, now try this explanation. The Great Bear Nanook (aka high pressure cold front) pawed the snow cover of the far north and stirred up a giant blizzard about the same time the Cajun giant catfish "Jack" was wiggling up another hurricane down in the Gulf. The Great Sky Serpent ( that you now like to call the"jet stream") snaked along with the cold from Nanook much farther south than normal and bumped "Jack's" hurricane out to sea. Then the Great Sky Serpent turned north only to get entangled with "Jack's" work product again. It was a mess, but a lot of cold air was let out of the high arctic, and a lot of hot air left the tropics in a big gulp. On a human scale the results were awful, but on a global scale the heat ex-changer functioned. In both cases the mechanics of what happened were driven by "Forces of Nature". Being a Force of Nature is what I do. I do it whether humans perceive me as a personality or just the sum of my parts.
Here is a news flash people we "Forces of Nature" have our jobs to do and we do them regardless of your perceptions. Humans, on the other hand, pretty much are in charge of perceptions. Reality is whatever humans perceive it to be and it can change over time . More over there is no requirement that all humans have the same perception. So if you like your forces of nature to talk to you I'm here. If, like the blind man, you want to examine the elephant by exploring its parts that's your privilege. You are in charge of your perceptions. But as long as so many of you have been willing to perceive me as an intelligence and to consider what I have to tell you, then I will remain in my new career as coastal environmental analyst and journalist. But even if perception fades and I retire from this scene I remain Namazu, The Earth Shaker.
For those of you on the edge of belief maybe a few photos of my "tiny" cousins will help you suspend your disbelief long enough to learn my all important lesson. The Forces of Nature are always at work, they will not be "conquered", man must learn to build his life incorporating them as a periodic reality. Think "Forces of Nature" aren't real check out the baby Namazus below :
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